To Be.. Or Not To Be - My Age...

 

 

I am a certain age.
A certain age not everyone knows..
An age so many would be shocked to know..
My age does not define me, though. It may define how some people treat me, but I certainly am not my age.

You see, most of the people I am associated with are way older than I am. In fact, the treat me like I am the same age as them. So imagine, I fit in with these older people (Yay moment!)..
Its not necessarily a bad thing. I mean, a bit of bad comes out of it, a ton of good though. I've learnt quuuite a lot of things about life, thats for sure..

I'm certain I'm very mature for my age.. I swear, sometimes I watch how people my age act and I'm like, "WTF AM I DOING HERE?!" They're not normal.. Or I'M not normal.. I dunno.. It's just not normal!

I think I grew up too fast. I've experienced and have done stuff people 3 or more years older than me haven't even come to terms with. Not all bad things, though.. but still, it's weird.. But funny.. I actually enjoy my life.

That's how my ''other life'' came about.. I'll share :
One day, I was out with friends. An older guy approached me and asked how old I was, I blurted out, "17".. (I was only 15)......
Well. as we started talking, he laughed and told me I certainly didn't speak like a 17 year old. But look, it's not like I said anything sexual, I just spoke sense..

That's when I realized I'm more myself around older people. This is weird huh? But look, people my age don't quite understand me. They're still stuck in this boy-craze teenage phase. I'm so past that.
Then, from then on, I always told people I was 18. As the years went past, the age I'd created for myself  increased..
Right now, I'm supposed to be 19.. Or 20.. I can't keep up with this thing anymore..
All I know is, I wake up at 5am for high school every morning, and come back home to wash my school shirt every afternoon.

So I guess I've just exposed myself to a lot of people who've had no idea. The people I'm closest to know, and they'll find this hilarious.. As I.

But why now? Why tell people my real age after I've created such an image for myself already?
It's because I am content with where I am as a person right now. I've learnt enough to accept the fact that I'm young, and grown at the same damn time!
I'm tired of having to tell people I'm going to work; only to enter the Northlands Girls' High School gates in the morning.. I'm tired of havimg to come up with petty excuses when I'm invited to events on a school night.. And, well, I also wanna be able to put up statuses about how Maths core fucked my brain over some days.

Now, only one question remains.. To Be, or Not To Be My Age?
I think its a bit too late to "act" my age, but I can still certainly be it. I can be 17 and content. I ca be 17 and still have fun. I can still be 17 and chill with my older friends.
So right now, from this day on, I choose to be honest and just accept the reality that I actually cannot fast forward time...

Well, that's me. Lumkokazi Amanda Sikoh Makhasi - Born in '96, andvanced at the age of 15.
Accept me. Or not. I actually will remain me...
I'm so chilled right now,bro.

P.S - I apologize to anyone I misled.. but if you're one of those who just assumed, well... Sorry!
But I guess I just proved the whole age theory.. We are how old we chose to be. Life has a way of curving one's mentality....

xx
Sikoh Cocoa